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From Ex-Gay to EXTRA Gay

Ex-gay testimonies are a thing. No question about that. I know this because I, like many of my friends, used to identify as ex-gay, or people who “struggled with same-sex attraction.” Since the late 90’s and mid-2000’s, when ex-gay or reparative therapy was in its hay day, it’s been proven numerous times by numerous health organizations that attempting to suppress or change your sexual orientation or gender identity is not only dangerous but downright deadly.

So why are there still people claiming to be ex-gay? Why do we still hear stories of people who were “healed” by God while the rest of us didn’t get the same blessing?

Here are my thoughts:

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  • Yvonne Interval Frith

    I LOVE this Kevin. My 33 year old son tried back in the day to “pray the gay away”. As if. He is still struggling emotionally, but thank God my husband and I began our fundamentalist unraveling and we could not be more thrilled that our extra gay son is the reason! Keep up the great work you do. xo

  • Jeremy

    Kevin, thank you again for this great work you do! This is such an important message to get out. I so identify with your experience, though I went further. How about married to a woman (beautiful, dear precious woman whom I did love very much), had children, and did all the church things to get free without success. Now struggling to live a genuine life, and be more gay than ever (lol), but it has meant starting over late in life. I’m feeling pretty isolated and cut off from family and “friends” (who were not really friends, I guess) and church, and not finding it easy to fit in with gay people either. I’m caught, as it were, between two worlds and fit into neither one. It’s a lonely place. I do so often wish I could go back into ex-gay, simply because it is so lonely out here. I even tried the gay church but it didn’t work for me.